Confidence is vitally important to a child’s future happiness, health, and success. Confident children are better equipped to deal with peer pressure, responsibility, frustrations, challenges, and both positive and negative emotions.
And what is the KEY factor in developing a child’s confidence?
YOU! The child’s parents and teachers.
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?” – Marianne Williamson
Use the effective strategies below to start boosting the confidence of your children or students today.
Ensure they know your love is unconditional:
The way we see our kids (or the way our kids believe we see them) has a profound impact on the way they see themselves.
Make it clear to your children (or to your students) that you love and care for them even when they make mistakes or poor decisions, and avoid harshly criticizing or shaming them.
Ask them for their advice or opinion:
Ask children for their advice or opinions on age-appropriate situations to show that you value them and their ideas.
This also helps children build confidence by demonstrating that even adults need help sometimes, and it’s okay to ask for it.
Make special time together:
Love and acceptance are key components of confidence and self-worth, so parents should spend quality time with their children to demonstrate that they are valuable.
Take him/her on outings, eat dinner together, play games, go outside, or do any other activity that allows you and your child to enjoy time together.
Teach them how to set and achieve goals:
Setting and achieving challenging, realistic goals can help children feel more capable. This will help them discover their capabilities and have faith in their abilities.
Praise them the right way:
Simply showering children with praise isn’t effective, but praising kids the right way can certainly build their self-esteem.
Give children genuine, specific praise that focuses more on effort than on results (like getting straight A’s) or on fixed abilities (like intelligence).
Do not compare them to others:
Avoid comparing children to siblings or classmates with questions like, “Why can’t you behave like him/her?” or, “Look how well your sister does in school! Why can’t you do that?”
These comparisons cause children to doubt themselves, believe that they can’t please you or meet your expectations, and ultimately lose confidence.
Let them make choices:
Like chores and special tasks, choices help children feel competent and powerful.
Allow children to make age-appropriate decisions like what to wear, what to eat for breakfast, what game to play or color to use, where to go on an outing, etc.
Teachers can build choice into the classroom by letting students make decisions about how they will demonstrate mastery of a skill (show what they know about weather by drawing a picture, writing a song, or creating a story) or letting the class discuss and choose certain books or activities.
Encourage them to try new things to develop new skills:
Children who lack confidence often shy away from trying new things or tackling new challenges.
Encourage the children in your life to branch out, try new activities, and develop new skills. This gives kids the confidence that they can tackle anything that comes their way.
Help them discover their interests and passions:
It’s also important for kids to discover their interests and passions. When children find what they like and excel at, they gain confidence in themselves and their abilities.
Create opportunities for your children or students to try activities that interest them, and be supportive of these endeavors.
Help them overcome the fear of failure:
The fear of failure often prevents children from trying their best and reaching their fullest potential, which can naturally diminish confidence.
Help kids overcome the fear of failure by teaching them that mistakes are a perfectly acceptable part of life and that people rarely achieve success without challenges and setbacks.
Encourage them to express their feelings:
When you criticize or overlook a child’s feelings, he may feel that his emotions don’t matter and conclude that this means he doesn’t matter either.
Encourage children to express both positive and negative emotions, and help them talk through these emotions in a healthy manner.
Surround them with positive, confident people:
The more a child is around positive, confident individuals, the likelier he is to become a confident and positive individual himself.
Parents, give your child strong adult role models and do your best to ensure that his friends are confident people who uplift and encourage your child rather than tearing him down.
Teachers, be a positive and confident role models for your students and teach your students to be kind and build one another up.